Final Countdown – 7 days

As I approach my last week in San Francisco, it’s all starting to feel real. I’ve done a great job of staying in denial, but I can’t anymore. Everywhere I look I’m faced with something that revolves around moving whether it be shipping off the few memories of my life I decided to keep, changing my address, canceling bills and saying my goodbyes.

Last night I went to a show downtown with some friends. It was the night before my going away party so I was still in the denial mindset. Halfway through the show my best friend told me she had a going away gift. I figured it was a drink, or some of the free peanuts they were giving away. I turned around to see one of my closest friends from LA. He originally told me he wasn’t going to be able to make it and I was heartbroken I wasn’t going to be able to say goodbye in person. They had all kept it a secret from me and he ended driving up so that he could be here for my final weekend. I officially lost it and the tears set in. I’m leaving. I’m leaving the city I love, the people I feel like I can’t live without, and a life that I spent so many years planning for. I’m going to a new city where I officially know no one. A city that people keep sending me articles about the dangers of life there. A city I’ve never even been to. However, this is my dream job. It’s an opportunity of a lifetime and I have to give it my all and trust in myself that things will be ok. That’s hard. It’s terrifying actually. But it’s exciting and thrilling too. No one is going to make me happy except me.

So here I am, 30 hours behind in reading, studying material I haven’t touched in years and preparing a resume for my new career. This is so very real now. And sadly, all those weeks I spent in denial, I’m pretty sure my body was storing tears I wasn’t using because I don’t think they’re stopping anytime soon.

The only thing I can concentrate on is one thing my mom has always asked me:

“How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time…”

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